Konoha Documentary: Naruto Style!
by krm3DeeDee
Summary: Naruto gets a videocam and basically, he starts taping his friends. Better read the story, I'm not good with summaries. Fun, chaos, maybe OOCness. pls don't flame. Reviews appreciated! It's my first and last Naruto fic. On Hiatus.
1. Chapter 1

**Konoha documentary : Naruto style!**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto, not the characters, just the plot. I will not use OCs, and I'll try to be funny on this one. It's my first Naruto fanfic, so please be merciful.

Chapter 1: Happy Birthday, Naru-chan!

The party was on: Naruto's first happy birthday, he was now thirteen and surrounded by his friends (AN: let's include Sasuke too, pretend that he didn't leave to join Orochimaru). Sakura treated him nicely all of a sudden, and Hinata poked her fingers together waiting for her turn to give Naruto a gift.

Hinata had discovered a bit of melancholy in Naruto as one night, after another hard mission in a trio Naruto – Kiba – Hinata; he was outside watching the stars and she joined him (of course), and he told her he wished he would always remember everyone how they are now, young and happy; she had smiled to herself.

So she decided to get Naruto a nice video camera, so he can film everyone. She looked ant the nicely wrapped package, then at Naruto. He was talking with Lee about improving his taijutsu. Everyone talked, laughed, some even danced: Ino with Shikamaru 'how troublesome' could be heard sometimes, and she smacked him; Sakura with Sasuke "So embarrassing" he muttered. "You lost the bet, can't back out of it. Enjoy the dance, it's not that bad!"; Neji with Tenten : "I still don't understand the utility of this, Tenten" "It helps improve your footwork, Neji. Ouch! You stepped on my foot!" "Sorry" "See? You need serious improvement!"

Hinata walked up to him.

"Naruto-kun…"

"Hinata-chan!"

"Ano….etou….(AN: can't help it, I have to use Japanese in here!)…Happy Birthday!"

"Thank you, Hinata-chan!"

"Douzo"

Naruto torn the paper with a hungry look on his face.

"Ano…what is this…?"

"You said you wanted to have us like this forever. Now, you can film us, Naruto-kun! This is a video camera; I also got you some cassettes."

"Sugoy! Arigato, Hinata-chan!"

He bent down and kissed her on the cheeks, and Hinata became as red as a tomato. She ran into the bathroom to calm herself, while Naruto shrugged and returned to his conversation with Lee. Sasuke in the mean time had ditched Sakura with a replacing technique, and Neji had improved his "footwork", as the genius that he was; Tenten chuckled to herself, happy that sometimes, Neji could be such a naïve shinobi. Shikamaru was growing into a dance addict. He took both Ino and Temari into a tango of three. Neji and Tenten had to retreat because their amateur dance was no match for Shikamaru's new found skill.

Naruto taped the dance – Shikamaru seemed to be in some sort of a trance, almost as if he had drunk…but anyway, it was great material. Naruto liked Konoha. It was his home, his everything. He looked at the camera in his hand and smiled. He new what he had to do. Show everyone how much he loved this village through the means of this object. Of course, he would make a documentary…and there were some unanswered questions that he had to answer…and preserve for the future, like…how does Neji keep his hair so well-groomed, shiny and silky? What are Sasuke's morning habits? How does Tenten look with her hair down? What would happen if Hinata performed "Sexy no Jutsu"? Naruto smirked. Oh, this will be fun!

Next Chapter: Naruto Detective, Neji's Amazing Secret

DeeDee: did you like it? Review, review!


	2. Neji's Amazing Secret

**Konoha documentary : Naruto style!**

**Naruto Detective, Neji's Amazing Secret**

**DeeDee: Who wants to do the disclaimer?**

**Lee: Me! Me! Me! I'll do the youthful disclaimer!**

**Naruto: No, me! I still have to repay her for treating me with ramen!**

**DeeDee: Decisions, decisions…let Naruto do it this time, you can have it the next chapter, Lee…**

**Lee:(**

**Naruto: She doesn't own Naruto, never did and never will. So no sueing! She doesn't own any brands of shampoo either (or bubblegum, or The AXE). Now, on with the story!**

Naruto walked around Konoha in search of his first victim, cough friend that would provide some nice material for the documentary. His camera in the hand, he would tape around him the daily activities of older ninja around him. Suddenly, he felt like he was being followed. He turned around to see a box moving after him. Naruto raised a brow.

"Konohamaru? What do you want from me now?"

"You found me! As expected of the boss!"

"I don't have time to play ninja now. I must find someone interesting to tape!"

"I was told to give you this note" Konohamaru winked. "From a lady"

"A lady?"

"I believe she is your…" Konohamaru raised his pinky. "Blue short hair, pale eyes, a Hyuuga by the looks"

"Oh, Hinata!"

"So that's you girlfriend's name!"

"She's not my…"

"Ja ne! Lucky dog…"

With that, Konohamaru dissapeared.

"Oi, Konohamaru! Cheeky brat! Hm, why would Hinata write to me?" he unfolded the paper.

'Naruto-kun, please meet me at the school entrance today at 4 o'clock. I have a favor to ask and I must ask it in person. Please, be there. Hinata'

"Hm… it's 3 o'clock now. I'll have five bowls of ramen at Ichiraku's and then head to school"

Hinata was already waiting by the time Naruto reached the school, an unpatient look on her face. She was already crimson red and she would poke her fingers as he appeared with his trademark grin.

"You wanted to ask me a favor, Hinata?"

"Yes, Nnnaruto-kun. You see, there is a-a party a-and I, being the Main House heiress, must attend it…and I di-didn't have a p-p-partner to go with…c-c-could you…"

"Sure!" he said

"Really? Wo-wonderful!"

"Actually, I wanted to ask you a favor too, Hinata-chan. Can you help me with the documentary?"

"Su-sure, what do I have t-to do?"

"How does Neji keep his hair so well-groomed, nice and silky?"

Hinata face-faulted.

"Neji? He -well, I do-don't know. I tried m-most of my time to a-avoid him" she said quietly.

"Ah, that's a pity. Would have made me happy to know that"

"Wait, I…I think I can h-help"

"Thanks a million, Hinata!" Naruto hugged her.

'Naruto is holding me in his arms' Hinata thought smiling dreamingly.

Hinata and Naruto were sneaking in the Hyuuga household (thank God Hiashi was out on a mission) to the branch chambers. There was Neji, in his bathrobe, his hair let loose, his tiny bangs barely covering the green seal. He walked up to the bathroom and into the tub which was pretty large, like a smaller swimming pool - five people could easily fit in there – and tossed to a side some bottles that he had brought with him. Hinata had her eyes closed all the time while Naruto had his camera record Neji's every move. Neji poured some sort of mixture into the hot water.

His presence still concealed, Naruto performed a jutsu he had created for Jiraya to help him spy the girls.

"Roses and vanilla. Strange. Oh, the presentations, yeah! My name is Uzumaki Naruto, known as the next Hokage, I'm thirteen and I've decided to make a documentary. Now for the first part, we are going to study the Hyuuga Neginus, the genius of the Branch who kicked my but in the Chuunin exam before I kicked his (yes, I'm being fair), trying to answer a questin that's been on mamy peoples' mind, especially Tenten's (hehe, friends know why!). So Neji poured a mixture of roses and vanilla into the water and put his hear under several times."

The camera kept rolling.

"The Nejinus specimen is awkward with his bathing habits. Looks a lot like a duck now…never thought I'd find this resemblance…"

"Shh! Naruto-kun, he might hear us!"

"Right! Sorry, Hinata!"

In the mean time, Neji seemed satisfied with the way his hair smelled and reached out for another bottle. Shampoo.

"The Neji specimen we're studying decided that he's had enough dips under water and took out his secret weapon! The…Herbal Essences Special? Ramen flavor? Wtf?!"

Naruto was beyond pissed. So Neji was actually the bastard that had bought all those bottles of shampoo before Naruto had the chance to buy one.

"Temeee!" he hissed.

Just then, Neji thought he heard something. He stopped what he was doing and looked around with the Byakugan until he saw something. Narrowing his eyes, he threw a kunai and heard a yell and a few girls boosted out. Unluckily, that was the only kunai he held with him. And unfortunately, the girls saw that too and grinned at his. So it was either be raped by rabid fangirls or run, letting them see you in all your glory. He chose b) and ran. Of course, the camera was on and caught everything. The girls left disappointed. Finally they had caught and occasion when the scary Hiashi was out!

Naruto sighed.

"Saved by fangirls, never thought that would ever happen!"

Hinata chuckled. Of course, she hadn't seen Neji since she had again kept her eyes closed. Suddenly, a kunai flew towards them. Hinata wanted to scream but Naruto covered her mouth.

"Shh! It's just Tenten"

"Why are you here?" she asked

"Same as you. To strip Neji of his secrets"

"Strip Neji? Not bad!"

Naruto raised a brow.

"And I thought Jiraya and Kakashi are the only perverts here!"

"E-hehehe. I lost a bet and I have to…"

"All right, no need to explain!"

Neji returned once he saw the girls leave disappointed.

"And now, the big finish" he muttered, once he used all the bottle of shampoo.

He took out one last small bottle and poured its contents into his palm.

"I don't recognize this smell. Darn, where is Kiba and his nose when you need them?!" he muttered frustrated.

"Right here, Naruto."

"Naniiii?!" Naruto almost jumped. "WTF are you doing here?!"

"Guess what, genius, everyone in the village wants to find out this! So be quiet and I'll tell you"

"All right, tell me, please"

Kiba sniffed the air.

"Umm…it's milk, cream, rosemary, basil, olive oil, ramen flavor, tutti frutti bubblegum flavor…another smell I don't recognize…and…uranium"

"URANIUM?!" Naruto yelled, but the sound came muffled thanks to Tenten and Kiba's hands covering his mouth. "That explains the shining hair. We have to stay away from him from now on."

"The last smell is AXE" Shino said from behind.

"Shino?! You're here too?!"

"Of course, this is a mission. We have to find out what he uses and tell Kurenai-sensei" he said with his oh-so-cool voice.

"Troublesome women" someone else said from behind. "Ino wants to find this out too"

"And Sakura" Sasuke mutterd from next to Shikamaru.

"And Temari" a depressed Kankuro said next to a murderous-looking Gaara.

Naruto sweat-dropped. So this won't be only his story at all. He turned off the camera and put it in its bag.

Just then, a thunder came upon them from above.

"May I ask what you all are doing here?!" a fully dressed terrifying looking Neji asked with his Byakugan activated.

Cliffy? Not quite. Hope you review.


	3. Tsunade's secret client

**Konoha documentary : Naruto style!**

**Chapter 3: Tsunade's secret client**

**DeeDee: Okay, Lee, it's your turn now!**

**Lee: Yosh! This time, DeeDee doesn't own Naruto, me (but she can own me if she wants to :) ) the manga, the anime, and sadly no item with the Naruto brand on it…**

**DeeDee (smacked him) You're not supposed to say that!**

**Lee: Ehm! She doesn't even own Tsunade's client (she said no OC's in the beginning, right?) but I wont say his name 'cause it's a surprise.**

**DeeDee: Finally! I do own the plot though…**

**Neji: Come, Lee! We have a training session in 20 minutes!**

**Lee: Coming! Osu! **

**DeeDee: Hey Neji…do you want to do the disclaimer next time?**

**Neji: It is not written in my destiny chart, so sorry. NO.**

**DeeDee: You don't have a destiny chart.**

**Neji: I do too!**

**DeeDee: Really? Then what are you supposed to do 5 years from today?**

**Neji: Uhm…propose to…**

**DeeDee: Propose to…?**

**Neji: Ja ne!**

**DeeDee: What?! Wait!!!**

Naruto sweat-dropped. So this won't be only his story at all. He turned off the camera and put it in its bag.

Just then, a thunder came upon them from above.

"May I ask what you all are doing here?!" a fully dressed terrifying looking Neji asked with his Byakugan activated.

"Neji! This is not what you think!" Tenten said. "You see, they are…they are…"

Suddenly the group was engulfed in a cloud of smoke, revealing very sexy women. Neji instantly had a large nosebleed, shrieked "fangirls" and promptly fainted. Yes, he had anemia.

"Sexy no Jutsu, succes!" Shikamaru said. "Thanks for teaching me, Naruto! I mean, for teaching us all" and they all went to normal.

"Yeah, that was sweet, I never knew Neji was a closet pervert" Naruto said dissapointed.

"You know, maybe we should take him to the hospital" Tenten said.

"Yeah, sure" said Naruto and turned his videocam off for the second time that hour. "Neji getting his first nodebleed with a Harem" he chuckled."Well, let's go!"

The next day, Naruto decided to go to Tsunade to request a new hadr mission that will bring him closer to his dream. Of course, he chose an unusual way and made sure his camera would record everything.

Once getting above her office, he heard more voices, so Tsunade wasn't alone.

"You must be careful with that kid. Uranium is not something to play with"

"Neji Hyuuga has his chakra protect the others from radiations. Besides, ninjas are immune to it. I don't see why this is a problem…unless you do us a favor"

"Sir, I don't believe you understand. We cannot be threatened by your weapons"

"Of course not, _Hokage_, but perhaps a nuclear missile will change your mind"

"And I suppose you call yourself civilised, _Mister President_?"

"Don't sweat, woman. I request an S-class mission."

Just then, Naruto decided to fall through the roof on the Hokage's desk.

"I want it! I want it! I'll definitely do it, dattebayo!"

"Naruto, this is for Jounins"

Naruto stood up and looked at the client. Tsunade decided to make the presentations.

"Uzumaki Naruto, President Bush and his bodyguards, the men in black"

"Ano sa! Ano sa! What's a president?"

"It's his country's Hokage, Naruto."

"Anyway, the mission I want you to do is capture Osama bin Laden."

"WHAT?!"

"Better do it, or else…"

With that, George Bush left. Tsunade was shocked by his request. Ninjas had sworn nor to meddle with the political affairs outside of Japan. She would practically send her Jounins into a foreign place far away…to their deaths.

"Tsunade-baa-san…we can capture him, right? I mean, how hard can it be?" Naruto said with his puppy eyes.

"All right then!" Tsunade yelled.

"Shizune, bring me the files! I'll form a team!"

"All the Jounins are out, and some must stay in the village…"

"…so that leaves us…"

Naruto grinned.

DeeDee: Cliffy! Whio will Tsunade send in Iraq? I'm waiting for suggestions!

Sorry for the short chapter, I'll make it up to you the next time. So, what do you think?


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